Well, ladies and gents, today I was thrown back into the swing of med school so hard that I have no clue what hit me. In a mere 13 hours, every hope and dream that I had of keeping my room clean, having a really awesome social life, and attempting to relax on a daily basis was thrown out the window.
For one glorious week in med school, I was able to make my bed every day, whip up some spaghetti or go grocery shopping whenever I wanted, do multiple loads of laundry, and at least think about working out.
And now, as I look out over my room that is in complete shambles, I know that I will never be able to cook, clean my clothes, work out or bathe again. I mean.... I will try to remember to bathe. That's probably an important one.
Anyway, I woke up around 10am, allowing myself to sleep in and recover from the epic Toga party we had last night (Yes, when we get the chance, we really do Party Like Med Students). I showered, made breakfast, and relaxed until my tutor group at noon, innocently thinking that today would be like the past week - relatively care-free and full of studying "for fun," rather than out of necessity. I went to my pathology tutor group and felt pretty good about the material. Two hours of studying necrosis and apoptosis flew by, and I was pysched to get a good room at school to finish what I thought would be a really fun and educational assignment. Boy, was I wrong.
As a part of pathology (the study and diagnosis of disease), we have weekly small group sessions. We are assigned cases and we have to act as both the clinician and the pathologist for each case, and specialize as an expert in an assigned case. I was so excited about this course component, because it is the first time we get to make differential diagnoses on our own and analyze pathological histology (microscopic slides of disease). In fact, I was so excited about small groups, that I acted like a total gunner and started researching each case last Wednesday, in my "free time," "for fun." I spent three hours looking up various diseases that I know nothing about (we haven't learned about them in class, yet) and getting excited about "being a doctor." So, today, I set up in my study room with a couple of good friends, and we started really working on the assignment. After an hour, none of us were past step ONE (there are at least three steps to each case) of case ONE (there are four cases).
All of a sudden, I realize that I am famished and run over to the hospital to get food. Then I realize - Oh, God! It's started! I'm forgetting to eat! I'm forgetting to take care of myself!
I run back to school, attend another tutor group, only to have more of my hopes and dreams shattered with the phrases "you only have to study pharmacology for two hours every day. One in the morning before class. One at night before bed. Basically, you need to make flashcards and be able to rattle off 900 drugs and their mechanisms, implications, and side effects in 20 minutes."
Whoa, now, back it up here.
1. Class starts at 8:30. That auditorium is lucky if I grace it with my presence. No way will I be studying for an hour before that.
2. One hour at night before bed? Nope. Don't see that a-happenin' either.
3. At least 3600 facts in 20 minutes? Disgusting.
After tutor group, I practiced physical exam skills for an hour, then came home and promptly began working on my path cases again. I made it through case one, and I had spent a solid hour on case two, when I clicked on a picture, and BOOM! The program deleted everything I had submitted for case two and I had the wonderful pleasure of restarting it. Technology, oh, how I love thee. That was four hours ago. Since then, I have completed case three and half of case four. I began to see double, my butt started hurting, and I actually had to google the definition of "carcinoma" just to make sure it still meant "cancer." That was the final breaking point.
Today, I have officially spent:
3 hours in tutor groups
1 hour in the physical exam suite
8 hours on path cases
...for a grand total of 12 hours on med school. I did not work out (or even think about it today). I did not make my bed. I did not fold my laundry. I did not pack my stuff up for my storage unit. I did not complete my lab quiz, or my pre-reading, or half of the other things on my personal and school to-do lists.
In six hours, I will be waking up to attend:
8 hours of class
1 hour of meetings
2 hour of physical exam skills
and at least 3 hours of homework (not even studying, just assignments)
...for a grand total of 14 hours on med school.
Overall, that will be:
3 gunner hours on path
8 frustrating hours on path
and probably 1 hour on path tomorrow because that's all I will have time for before small group
...for a total of 12 hours on one assignment.
Nothing says "Welcome back to med school" more than the complete feeling of exhaustion and the fact that every time I close my eyes I see histology slides.
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