Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Resident Ghost

Anyone ever get that creepy feeling like a spirit or a ghost is in the room? Well, that happened to me the other day, and as I was recounting the story to my 90 year-old great grandmother, it reminded me of this little med school gem. 


Basically, I live at the med school. I am a night owl, so my most productive hours are about 7pm to 3am (extremely unfortunate... currently working on being a normal person who likes daytime). As a result, I am on first name basis with all of the janitors. One of them even bought me groceries first semester. I must have looked particularly haggard and starving that week, because she came into my study room with a huge Walmart bag full of my poor-student-microwaveable-food-of-choice: Thai Peanut Noodles. She set them down on the table, told me it looked like I needed some food, and wished me luck studying. Looking back, that's kind of embarrassing... but mostly awesome. She even included mini-Nerds and Smarties for dessert. Then there's the second floor janitor. He is actually an established artist. When he handed me his card to check out his artwork online, he gave me this warning, "Don't be alarmed or offended by the nude photos." Dude, I'm gonna be a doctor. Nudity is in. Anyway, his artwork is pretty incredible. His wife is an astrologist and did a reading for me... it's amazing the things you learn about others and yourself by just striking up random conversations. They even invite me to their house for holiday dinners now. 

Back on topic. Since I know all of the janitors, I also know their cleaning schedules. I know that every time I remember that I have to pee, they will be cleaning the downstairs bathrooms. Therefore, I walk upstairs to pee on the second floor. Late at night, when I walk out of the bathroom and turn left, I see a head and shoulders in the window of the last clinical suite. At first, this alarmed me. I was totally freaked out when I walked over to see who was studying inside, and no one was there. I attributed it to too much caffeine, exhaustion, and high stress levels. Then, I saw the face again, and I saw it disappear. I was even more freaked out. Over the course of the year, I saw the face ~10-15 times total, and I got used to it, referring to her in my head as the Resident Ghost. I never mentioned this to anyone, as I say weird things on a regularly basis, and decided it best to leave this one out. Then, one night during finals week, my two girlfriends and I were leaving school late, around 3am. We all had to go to the bathroom on our way out, and I suggested we use the downstairs one because occasionally the upstairs one freaks me out. My one friends says, "OMG! Have you seen her in the window too!!??" 

How crazy is that!? My med school has a ghost. Reppin.

Thursday, June 14, 2012

Nerd, Geek, Dork: Which One Are You?

There is clearly a difference between a nerd, a geek, and a dork. 

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Nerd: someone who is passionate about learning, being smart, academia

Why They Are Nerds: thirsty for knowledge and life-long learning; innate desire to understand, rather than accept
What They Look Like: Nerds are the hardest to spot. Stereotypically, nerds look like Urkel - big glasses, pocket protector, high pants, tucked in shirt, etc. Realistically, nerds are just people that like to learn and work hard, ultimately achieving success. Therefore, the only difference between the Urkel and the sexy athletic M4 is the ability to hide their nerdiness. And even then, a lot of nerds prefer to own their nerdiness, taking it as a compliment when someone calls them "nerdy," and seeing it as a turn-on when they meet a fellow nerd.
What They Do For Fun: read, reorganize notes, color-code, study
Where They Like To Go: library
How They Rate a Movie: based on theme/meaning or how closely it followed the book
What They Collect: books, library cards, knowledge
Special Talents: Note-taking, extreme speed and accuracy with a dictionary/encyclopedia/search engine, ability to rattle off random facts
Annoying Traits: automatically correct spelling and grammar errors, obsess over grades, slight OCD
High School Superlative: Most Likely to Succeed
When They Act Like Nerds: All the time. Nerds are constantly thinking and over-loading their brains. Fortunately, most are able to remain socially competent by learning when to keep their mouth shut... unless surrounded by other nerds. 


Geek: someone who is passionate about a particular area or subject, usually an obscure, technological, or difficult one

Why They Are Geeks: obsess over acquiring information about their unique interests, but don't necessarily care about underlying principles
What They Look Like: Geeks are easier to spot than nerds, usually because they don't care as much about what people think of them. They tend not to follow fashion trends, sometimes not even caring if their clothes match or if their hair is combed. Occasionally appear disheveled.
What They Do For Fun: dress up as their favorite character to go to the midnight premiere of Star Trek/Harry Potter/Hunger Games/Lord of the Rings, join fan clubs, search internet forums
Where They Like To Go: Game Stop, Best Buy, movie theaters, anime conventions, Comicon
How They Rate a Movie: based on special effects
What They Collect: electronics, video games, comic books, action figures
Special Talents: speak Elvish, fix computers, hook you up with baller entertainment systems, Internet skills
Annoying Traits: begin conversations about hardware/software
High School Superlative: Most Likely to Work for Apple
When They Act Like Geeks: at home on their computers or anywhere around technology


Dork: someone who is socially awkward and relatively clumsy

Why Dorks Are Special: In my opinion, the term "dork" is usually used in a temporary fashion. While nerds and geeks tend to be nerds and geeks for life, "dork" is usually used to describe a person in a specific scenario. For example, I have a friend who is famously terrible for delivering bad pick-up lines. After watching him waltz over to a lady, who was clearly with her boyfriend, spin a chair around backwards like he was AC Slater, and then ask, "Can I buy you a drink? Because you sure do look like Snookie," I called him a dork. He has some of the best stories, all of which I wish I would have witnessed, because of his social awkwardness with the ladies.



What They Look Like: There are two types of dorks. 
Type I can be spotted tripping in public and laughing it off, because they are aware of their dorkiness. These dorks tend to embrace their social awkwardness, and you can laugh with them. They tend to be funny, silly, and a welcome addition to any party. 
Type II can be spotted tripping in public, turning bright red, and running away with their head hanging, because they are extremely self-conscious. These dorks tend to fear their social awkwardness, and you can't laugh with them. You could laugh at them, but then, if you are a good person, you usually feel bad and just wish you could help them. They tend to be quiet and sitting in the back of the classroom, in order to avoid all attention. Luckily, most Type II dorks tend to develop into Type I dorks after they learn to embrace their occasional clumsiness, leave the embarrassment behind, and just have a good laugh.
What They Do (For Fun?): trip, fall, joke, deliver bad pick-up lines (type I) or avoid flirting in general (type II)
Where They Like To Go: middle of the stage during a talent show (type I) or straight home after school (type II)
How They Rate a Movie: based on how many people are dorkier than they are
What They Collect: bruises, embarrassing stories (generally very funny to tell)
Special Talents: sense of humor (Type I), creating awkwardness
Annoying Traits: creating awkwardness
High School Superlative: Class Clown, Best Sense of Humor
When They Act Like Dorks: The dork holds the element of surprise, the wild card. You never know when the dork will shine. Be ready at all times, preferably with a First Aid kit. 

Which One Am I? Is this even a real question?

According to OKCupid.com, I am Pure Nerd. SURPRISE! 

96% Nerd, 48% Geek, 17% Dork, to be exact. 

I definitely could have predicted this, with my OCD note-taking skills, desire to build a two-story library in my house, and obsession with random facts. Come to think of it, I basically fit every part of nerd description, except I have a hard time keeping the nerd under control in social situations (and I do really, really try sometimes). I also suck at Trivial Pursuit if I'm playing with my parents. And my High School Superlative was Biggest Flirt, although I did get Most Likely to Succeed in the eighth grade.

I have to say, I am slightly impressed by my geekiness. In general, I am very directionally challenged and technologically disinclined. Although, my dad's geekiness results in me having way more technology than I know how to handle. I also admit I may or may not have dressed up for a Harry Potter midnight premiere... or two... or five actually. But, considering I thought "wi-fi" was pronounced "whiffy" up until recently, I can understand why I didn't hit the 50% mark.

As far as dork goes, I don't really like this term, so it's reassuring that I didn't score high on the list. This has nothing to do with not liking dorks or the description - in fact, I can be one of the most socially awkward people I know in some situations, and weird things happen to me that I attribute to clumsiness. Prime example: last summer I almost died (slight exaggeration). My obituary would have had to list the cause of death as "beach umbrella." My mom and I were enjoying a few days at the beach, and we went down to read at 7am. No one else is on the beach, except for one family, and they are sitting a quarter of a mile to our right. Not even within shouting distance. The wind starts to blow a bit, and they lose their beach umbrella. It comes cartwheeling across the vast sands, and they are chasing it. Now, it is heading right towards us. It would have been a jerk move if I got up and ran in the opposite direction instead of helping them out. So, I stand up, brace myself for the umbrella, try to catch it, and the pointy end comes right up, smacks me in the face and stabs me in the jugular. It knocks me over, stuns me, cuts my neck, and I start to bleed. Thankfully, the family could stop chasing their umbrella, since it was impaled in my neck and I was twisted all up in it. Clumsy? Yes. Socially awkward? Absolutely. 



Anyhow, the reason I don't like the term "dork," is because I am a Pure Nerd and actually know that people refer to a "whale penis" as a "dork." Therefore, I commonly refrain from using this term, as every time I do, I automatically think "whale penis." Weird. 



After looking at the other classifications, I'd have to say that the quiz hit the nail on the head, and I enjoy being dubbed Pure Nerd. It definitely fits me better than Pure Geek or Pure Dork. And Joe Normal just sounds boring. Now, Computer Savant, that's a scary one. I didn't even have to read the description to know I would never qualify for that title. Tri-Lamb Material sounds pretty badass (you need over a 50% in both Nerd and Geek to earn this awesome title), and so does Modern, Cool Nerd. Outcast Genius is the last of the categories, and this title makes me slightly sad for anyone who earns this honor, and slightly jealous of them (over 50% required in all three categories).

Which One Are You? 



Sunday, June 10, 2012

You know you're a med student when...


Yesterday, my family and I were driving in the car and I looked at the stereo system.

It read: 71 º , NE.

You know you're a med student when you automatically think "71 º, Norepinephrine,"  instead or "71 º, Northeast." This got me thinking about all of the weird things I do, probably because:
1. I am a medical student.
2. I am a really big nerd. 

I came home and googled "You know you're a med student when..." and came across a really depressing version, where the top reason was something like "you know you're a med student when 80% of your male colleagues will marry a nurse and 80% of your female colleagues won't marry at all." Yikes. So, after consulting some of my fellow classmates and contemplating the weird things that I do, I decided to create my own list.

You know you're a med student when:

1. You are in a car and think "norepinephrine" when you see "NE," instead of "northeast."

2. You see the following pattern on a papertowel and think "cholesterol."



3. You wake up terrified because you dreamed about forgetting to turn in homework or studying for a test for a class that you didn't even realize you were enrolled in... and then you realize it's summer.

4. You buy your first wrinkle cream and start checking for grey hair at the age of 23 because you're convinced med school adds 40 years to people.

5. People ask you what you do for fun, and you say, "SLEEP."

6. You look forward to family reunions so that you can offer free physicals to practice your exam skills... and you actually think this is a good idea, until you see the look on your mother's face.

7. You forget how to describe the locations of things without using the terms "superior, inferior, lateral, medial, anterior, posterior, etc."

8. You can't eat your roast beef sandwich because when you take the bread off to add mustard, it reminds you of the brachial plexus you just spent four hours dissecting.

9. You walk out of cadaver lab to the lockers, and think there is a blood clot on the floor... then realize it's a piece of brownie.

10. You own the following shoes, and you love them:




11. You wish you could listen to everyone on double speed.

12. You look at cross section of a penis, and compare it to Kanye West.

http://images.cheezburger.com/completestore/2010/8/3/84f15104-2ad4-4a42-a225-da9fd8755e49.jpg


13. You feel socially incompetent around non-medical people because you can't shut off the Med School Button, and therefore do not know what to talk about.

14. Because you can't shut off the Med School Button, you continually see the blank stares from your family and friends because they are totally tuned out to you... but you keep describing a disease or pathway anyway. It's good review.

Every med student needs THIS button!

15. One of your favorite games to play is "What would I name my kid: (Insert Med School Class Here) Version".
Neuroscience version: Tentorium Cerebelli
Anatomy version: Gubernaculum 
Pharmacology: Allegra

16. You thank your kidneys every time you pee while intoxicated. They just function so well!

17. The morning after you drink, you see the Tylenol bottle and automatically think "CYP, GSH, NAC, liver toxicity," as you reach past it for Aleve or ibuprofen.

18. You turn in your last final, and then somebody hands you 1200 pages of notes for one class, in case you want to read it over Christmas break.

19. You think you have every disorder that you read about. And when someone calls you a hypochondriac, you secretly think, "Yes, but "hypochondriac" also refers to the upper lateral sections of the abdomen, on either side of the epigastric area, below the rib cartilage."

http://shs.westport.k12.ct.us/forensics/02-evidence/regions_&_quadrants.gif

20. You can't eat eggs or fungus because you know too much "science-y" stuff about them.

21. You are excited when you get to shower before an exam, because it is a sign you feel "prepared."

22. Your friends text you pictures of random body parts and want a diagnosis and treatment plan. And they stop going to real doctor, because they think they can just ask you.

23. Your family asks you about all of their health problems during the holiday dinner. And then you make up something that sounds legit... and then tell them that you don't really know anything. Unfortunately, you've just lost your appetite because your great grandmother spent 20 minutes describing every colonoscopy she's ever received.

24. You know that "Army over Navy" and "Tom, Dick, and nervous Harry" don't refer to the military or three men.

25. You close your eyes at night and random body parts pop into your head, you start dissecting them and labeling them, and you are completely okay with this because you count it as studying. 



To be continued...